Is your support contributing to your athlete’s anxiety?

Parents contribute to an athlete’s athletic career in countless ways. After all, one of the many roles of a parent is to offer support. Among the most notable ways are financially, practically, technically, organizationally, and emotionally.

Some parents reading this right now are laughing because the first might be truer than ever in today’s youth sport landscape. It is said children are an investment, and youth sport has a way of zapping the bank account. Not only do you have to pay to be on the club team, you have to pay for strength training, additional skill lessons, mental performance consulting, tournament fees, hotel rooms and food during travel to those tournaments. It seems endless—and sometimes exhausting.

Through all of that, you still offer emotional support because you want the best for your child. But how and when you communicate and offer that support could play a role in the athlete’s performance.

Some parents choose to sit to the side and quietly cheer on their athlete, encouraging them to give their best effort. Maybe every now and then let out a medium-voiced, “Way to go!” or in the case of a missed play, “Oh no!”

Other parents take a different role and offer a much more vocal appeal such as, “That’s my girl!!” hoping everyone in the vicinity hears. Neither approach is wrong, but when the loud calls from the sideline turn more critical, it is important to reflect on the impact it might have on your athlete. Are your actions matching your desired goals for them?

A 2022 research study looked into verbal sideline behaviors of parents and found their actions or words spoken during competition did not match the goals they said they had for their youth athletes.

In fact, according to the study, athletes reportedly prefer their parents to maintain a positive and calm environment by giving encouraging feedback. This includes speaking to game officials and coaches in a positive way. After competitions, the athletes said they wanted their parents to allow the time for them to process the outcome and provide positive feedback.

One way to do this is through reflective practice.  Reflective practice allows the parents to become more self-aware of their communication with their athlete. This will ultimately help strengthen the relationship between the parent and the athlete and reduce worry and anxiety caused by pressures placed on them by coaches and parents.

A 2014 research study in the Journal of Applied Sport Psychology, for example, found that when parents set performance-based goals for their athletes, such as out-performing an opponent, anxiety increased for the athlete. When the parents offered positive and encouraging feedback, the athletes became more confidence and had lower levels of anxiety.

It might be difficult to find that line of being the ultimate parent offering endless support and feedback, but effective communication and the right level of support is crucial to the continued development of all youth athletes.